Last week end was this Artbasaar in Tornio, Aineen art museum, it's one of the few happenings where I actually enjoy to go and sell my art. It's not just that there's always people willing to buy, but it's the atmosphere and people there... they are... we are in same boat. Happenings like these, keep's me believing in my self and that someday, when it's possible, I can and I should start doing this professionally... like... getting my studio.
I don't know how much there was visitors this year.. thousands anyhow, but it was enjoyable and people are starting to remember me... they specially come to find me and see what new I've made.. and there's some who always buy something.
here's our desk and my team.
Anyhow. as usual, we went there with low expectations yet ones again left quite happy but tired. I was thinking to just relax a week or so now.. but then we, by accident find out that there's again little bit same kind of happening in our hometown, so now we are booked there too next Sunday. we shall see how that goes.
All the same time I learned that there's exhibition where I should take a part, but because I'm so slow, I haven't realize it's quite soon, and now I need to know can I take a sculpture there or do I have to play with paintings... if so.. I think I might pass the exhibition. and I should also do some text about me self for art book... so much to do.. so much...
anyhow.. I thought to write short blog now, before continue to do everything else.
I've heard this website for artist to find patrons. People who help to keep em making art and maybe get something back from the artist (well the word artist is wide here, there seem's to be bloggers, youtube people, about lot's of different kind of stuff) so I'm thinking to list my self there too. Because I do so called slow art, and even that I don't ask even thousands from them usually, the customers are hard to find this economic downtime's that governments only want to make worse because the capitalism is what rules now'a'days. SO Because I have quite many followers in facebook, I do get nicely likes for my art photos and videos have been seen. I thought I give it a try... maybe there's people who are willing to spend dollar, euro or couple a month to help me to do the one thing I'm good at.
This way I could take my art to next level, do more art, do more sculptures. maybe even rent a tiny studio where to do art... get proper video making tools so my videos would look better and that way too get more people to enjoy watching me working.
Because right now, I work from either our home living room when everyone else is sleeping or when I'm visiting my mother's place, I borrow her garage (but it's cold one so can't use it at winter time) basically art helps people, not just the artist but people who see em too. that's a fact. I've been told often that my art is amazing and people enjoy to see it, but it's not something that everyone would want at them house, but they love to see it when they visit gallery, or library or somewhere public.
Tight now I'm occupied with artbazaar next weekend I need to back my stuff, make sure I get all the things ready (that's why I'm currently at my brother's place and smoking some last summer sculptures.
I hate to live in country where everything is expensive and to start your own business you have to dive in such a huge pile of crap (read bureaucracy) that if you ain't already rich.. it's hard. because you have to be able to buy every darn licence and make tax things and the best part of this all is that.. to get some start money.. you need to show people how much you can make money.. but you can't know that before you have the business?
so.. I would like to stay doing art, having exhibitions (but I would do that around the world not just northern Finland) and talk with people about art. but that too, need's money because, this may come shock to some... gallery's are businesses. artist need's to buy time and room from there.. expect if you are some darn famous already, then gallery might actually give you free or even pay you. it's a weird world.. it's same in Finland. to get art stipend you need to be already famous and making money from your art! meaning.. the people who need the art stipend, won't get it.
so we'll be back to subject many patron from my hopefully fans, people pay me little a month, but if there's many fan in game. it'll be enough.
And I will be giving back to you all. If this starts to work, there will be stuff back at you. like, I can send you my coloring pages email, make wallpapers from my art/ photos .. all depending how much are you willing to spend to help me be what I'm meant to be.
There are so much things I would like to take my art in.. or start doing again.
Like jewelry making.. I did love to do silver jewelry.
I would, and will, someday start doing tattoos too. I have designed many for other's, but I haven't ever done my self because I don't have equipment or money to get ones..
NO.. definitely not in Finland.. I mean with my art.
Well.. not really a dry season, I do have lot's of drawings, and one drop--art under work.. but.. don't feel like the drawing.. and drop-art is slow.. I can do it a little, and then I have to let it dry for couple hours.
The thing is that I'm sculptor, ceramic sculptor mostly, but I do like to use different materials too, like wood or stuff. But in Finland, for that you need big studio, hall.. because our summer is short. I would love to work outside with my sculpting... but I cant.
I get slightly depressed every autumn, specially when I can't get to hunting because of many reasons. And the fact that I can't do my thing, sculpting... make's everything even harder.
I might have told, no I really don't remember what I have written earlier and I'm to lazy to check it, that I have problems with my physics and the autumn and winter are quite hellish for me.. I'm living in constant pain, but autumn and winter it's doubled. and when I hit the dry season with my art.. well, it just make's things worse.
Art is important for me, I need to be doing something all the time, if I just hang out it make's things bad. painting, drop art, jewelry, drawing.. I usually just hop from one to one.. but right now I can do only one drop art or draw.. and... man can only draw as much.
That brings us the the subject of my latest dream... I dream of moving to somewhere warm... I dream of Hawaii :D
warm where I could have outdoor studio... well.. sure it doesn't need to be Hawaii, and I'm not huge fan of the fact that it's part of USA... but something about that place make's me smile.
well.. that's all folks.
Man could think that it's not that hard to film how you work.. but to be honest.. it is if you don't have camera.. this video like all the other's have been shoot by my mobile phone. and at some point I was out of memory.. so the end is made of photos.
There's still some things, like where I put the camera next time when I do something or maybe I should give some hints to boyo what I want from the video... but to think that all I did was drop a file full of videos and photos to the boyo and asked him to make me a video... well this is darn good.
and I must say that boyo make's the music him self. and I like it for some reason.
you can find hes channel (https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCMceG6_qRNlnFjYYHtgVoSg)
This owl was customer's order. Owl that wasn't to freaky and still needed to look like it was made by me. and as you maybe see in the video.. I don't do much of planning before.. it's my hands and eyes that know where to take the project.. thankfully most of my customer's know what they want.. they want just that :D the order made in couple words.
anyhow. here it is.
I have my own channel where I like to share videos of my art, how I do em and stuff..
The funny thing is that even I'm media-professional from 10 years ago.. I quite much suck with videos... SO most of times, it's my teenage son who does the videos for me. But he is teenaged so the helping old-man is not priority one. The gaming and doing music are more high on hes list.
My channel can be found here.. : https://www.youtube.com/user/TheBeebleb_
You can quite easily see the difference, but I shall show it to you anyhow.
Here's a video I made.
and then there's couple videos that boyo made me..
I think there's good reason for me to stay away from video editing?
People do ask me to make more videos of me working, not just photos combined as video, but to do that, I need to get some kind of small video camera, and I don't yet have one. But when I do, I start video not only me sculpting, but draw and paint and.. all the art I do.
So... as I write boyo is ... I won't say doing.. but he should be doing a new video for me.
oh by the way.. is this blog quite weird and show new post's at the end of blog or top? because the way I see, it's at the end.. and that's. just.. stupid. and I don't know what to do about it.
This is not going to be long writing... because it's middle of night.. almost morning... I have not slept yet, just been updating this website and trying to learn this blog thingie. It's normal for me.. to do things middle of night.. I live in small apartment with my family and only time when I can use all the space in night.
so that's when I work.
Sure I can draw a little middle of day... or work on one painting.. but only nights I can do all at the same time.. and watch movie or series.
At the moment I'm working on with many things.
I have projects.. and so much ideas.. but as said.. I don't have studio at the moment.. so I can't do much sculptures.. but I'm talking with a friend that maybe I could rent a table from her studio time to time.. so I could do some sculptures if the need comes so high.. or I get order interesting enough.
But... maybe I should tell what I plan to do with this blog?
I think I will write here my mystical artist ideas.. show what I'm doing.. or how I did something? I will post here my youtube videos for you to see and.. well.. update where I'm going, where I want to be and stuff like that.
but that's all for now.
hopefully someone starts to read this..
anyhow.. leave me some comment's.. and .. say hi?
All I tell is truth as I see or remember it... that to be told.. I'm good at lying... even to my self.
I'm a country boy, even that it has been soon couple century's since I've lived officially at the country side. But you can't get that need out of man. I live in city, as long as needed.. but someday I'll be back.
Even since I was child, I've had amazing imagination. I didn't need friends to play with me... I could spend whole day in the forest all by my self, but I never was alone. Most of my plays were about fantasy, knights, magic... you get the picture.
my imagination did get me troupe.. or other around me. I'm still not sure of the facts but there might be chance that I have lie more than ones to make adult think that my brother did things I've done.
I have also drawn all my life... I can remember back in very first steps in school how teacher had to "wake" me from my drawing trance because I was living my drawing :D
I've been told later, that my close ones had tried to get me to be examined because of my ... huge amount of energy, but our school nurse did stop all that.. so.. my school times were quite horrible because most of teachers did treat me like I was stupid or bad because I could not stay still. but at home I was just let be free. So ..even that I did bring lot's of worries and grey hairs ... I think I was loved. and because of that I'm the man I'm today.
after elementary school I did actually want to study art's and crafts, and my art's teacher from elementary school did try to make me do that.. but all the other education people tried to say something else.. and I didn't want to move to far so.. I started to study media-crap. it was good because I found wifey trough that... and the school did give nice basic knowhow about all media.. tv.radio.computers... multimedia.. even acting and arts.
but the wifey is the best thing. even that there has been the normal up's and downs.. we are still together. and we have this amazing teenage son :D
I know there are people who don't understand when I say I'm what I am because of my wife. They don't see the same woman I see at my side and I don't know why. She's always there, even when she's angry at me (because I still do lot's of stupid thing's) she's always there and have my back. She's strong independent woman who for some reason has fallen in my spell. back when I tried to wrote my stories down she was giving me my support, but she did hint that that maybe was not the best way of use for my imagination. Later I've realized that she was right... I have stories and ideas, but I also have dyslexia and I forget a lot.. so.. I feel i'm more of use as support for my brother and hes writing project.
There was time, after our son had birth and I was send home from army training (because I did not agree with people to yell at me and tell to do stupid things just because.. later I did get freed for that because of my physic's and mental health) that I tried to suppress my need of story telling. I tried to use my social skill's and learn to be practical nurse... when that failed.. I tried to be builder.. but my knee didn't agree with that or my head with all the numbers.. back then I didn't know I had any difficulties because no one ever had told me that... there might be. I was kind of under the impression that I am just kind of slow.
Well we moved a lot.. I bought a lot of stupid stuff that I didn't need.. I did all kind of stupid just because I could an never thought twice was it smart.
Then after short working period I found my self as studying to be youth worker.. leader.. what ever. around then I accidentally met this psychology who tough that all was not fine with me. No. this was little before I started the school. the psychology send me to psychiatry the head doctor... and soon after that I was told some things they think was true to me.. and to be honest. I was relieved after that. They did study me quite a lot. some different people.. to make this easier, I use word's I understand.
I'm Idiot Savant - well.. kind of.. I don't have the middle thing around in many things.. I'm either idiot or genius. Like.. Math.. i'm total idiot.. but crafts.. I haven't found what I can't do... wait no. that's a lie.. crochet that I can't understand at all.. but this far I've learned well.. quite without anyone really teaching... some people just have give me tools and maybe little hints... I can work with wood. I can do tiny sculpting s.. or build house for dog. I can do tiny metal work.. like silver.. I've made several silver rings. I can paint.. draw.. make food or.. bread. and I can work with clay.
But I suck with most of reading and without writing aid I could not write even this blog. But blog writing is the... easiest way for me to express my thoughts. I have difficulties with speaking.. I forget words all the time and I stutter. I'm afraid of people, not as individuals but as crowd.. all the feast and stuff are horrible so I use to be drunk all that time.. now I have left most of alcohol because it make's me do stupid things and be horrible person... but I love beer so.. I hold on to that.
what else.. so.. I'm kind of idiot savant.. I have dyslexia, I'm "adhd" child (I don't believe in adhd) I have bipolar disorder, maniac.. I have most of times way to much energy and speed to stop thinking... but I have been depressed too couple times. and.. that's just what I have in head. (I must say that the same head doctor did say also that I'm idiot with languages ... so not sure how much I can but weigh on that on particular doctor because I speak and write two languages (Finnish and English) not perfect either but good enough for people to understand. I also do understand little Swedish and Spanish and even some words of Germany, French and Korean.. and if there would be people who speak those around me.. I would learn more soon.
oh and I have broken back, knee and wrists (wrists are still mystery why).
what else should I tell you? I'm huge fan of Sir Terry Pratchett (and let's just say that Neil Gaiman, Douglas Adams, J.R.R Tolkien, George Martin, Ursula LeGuin and Robin Hobb are high in my list... and them are not all) so.. I read much even that it's slow and hard sometimes.. but funny enough normal books are quite easy for me to read, but study books with al the numbers mix there and different columns and stuff.. those I cant.. or most of new's papers.. because the same reason.
Movies and tv series are high on my enjoyment too.. I quite often do art and watch something at the same time :D just to keep me not getting bored.
Back to story then... after all this.. I still did try to study Youth counselor stuff... but middle of school me and teachers agreed on that this is no good... because the fact that I was good with kids. as teachers say I have weird charisma that demanded people to listen me... so when I had a good day.. soon everyone had.. but damn if I had horrible day.. the rest of week was ruined for poor kid's too.. and other people who worked with me..
so it was again time to look for new ideas? I finally did start to look around art's and crafts seriously. Not to far from our home there was this.. Indoor textile school.. you know.. felting, make textiles, cloths, but em on furniture and stuff.. I somehow was interested on that... I even started to study that... until employment agency shoot me down.
at that point.. I had breakdown.
I was lucky enough that after half a year sick free I get in rehab to art workshop..
after the rehab I get in ceramic's and I started more seriously other art stuff too.. and.. well. here we are now.
I'm at the point that in year or two I will start my own studio and do this full time (well I do already but I have no means to get money to make a living by this) maybe even get to somewhere far because of my talents ;)
I promise this is the longest blog I write.. for now on.. It'll be more art, or what I do. or how I did it stuff.. maybe even some videos from youtube.